... and I step out of the wings, onto this stage. Life is a stage and I am an actress. Let this blog be another act or scene to my life. An act or scene where, perhaps, I can act less and show more of my true self. Imagine the hush that falls across the audience as I walk, slowly, deliberately, to center stage. The air is filled with tension. The audience have no idea what I am going to do or say. In a dramatic stage whisper, I tell you the story of my life. The show is unscripted, raw, painful to watch at times yet heart-breakingly beautiful at others. Welcome to my blog.
I am a girl with big dreams... some dreams feel like they are implanted into my mind while others are truly my dreams.. overall, I am a rather complicated person, too complicated to be described in one blog post, but I shall do my best. I am still in high school, I have a good memory and tend to do well in exams, especially biology. People sometimes envy me for my grades but what they don't know is that every time I study for an exams, I push myself so hard I feel that I lost a part of my soul in the process. People see the As but they do not see the pain behind the As.
Ballet is my life. There is a long story behind why I love ballet so much but that story is for another day. Currently, in order to study for my final exams in my final year in high school, I have stopped my dance lessons. But once a dancer, always a dancer. The moment my exams end, I'm going back to the studio and losing myself in dance.
I am a very arty person. I love theater, visual arts, dance etc etc. Funnily enough, I'm taking mostly science subjects in school. Of course, my parents have something to do with that. I consider myself lucky, to have a home, have food on the table, but it is in the human nature never to be satisfied. I long for freedom. My parents are strict and they dictate every aspect of my life. About one more year to college and to freedom!
Books are also another essential part of my life. I love to read. All kinds of books, from classics to trashy romances, even Fifty Shades. Haha! If not for books, I would just be like any other teenager whose life revolves around studies, friends and parents. I love to contemplate human nature and often, I have many random thoughts popping into my head. Nietzsche is a crazy but cool guy, in my opinion. Not surprisingly, half of my "friends" only have the vaguest idea that Nietzsche is a random German philosopher.
Life, to me, is a beautiful tragedy. I imagine life as a beautiful woman with scarlet lipstick and nails, lounging on a crimson couch and watching the world at her feet. She laughs at our petty troubles, randomly choosing to help some people while tormenting others with even more obstacles. We humans are merely little specks of dust in the grand scheme of things. Nevertheless, this does not mean that our lives don't feel real to us. We define our lives and ourselves. The trouble is, we don't often know how to do so. I am trying, at this very moment, to do that. Just sharing my life helps, which brings us back to my blog.
I am going to post really random things that happen in my life and one day, many years down the road, I will look back and laugh at myself. For now, I invite you to share my joys, my tears and my fears.
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